Good Old Fashioned Drunken Turkey Recipes

Steps:

• Rub turkey with olive oil massaging it gently and roughly alternatively the turkey likes to be fondled for some reason.
• Then sprinkle the marjoram over the bird.
• Again make sure the turkey is covered-- she doesn't enjoy bare breasts or legs!
• Using the needle and syringe, inject the turkey with 1/2 cup of old expensive whiskey in various locations.
• When you are sure you have enough alcohol in it, spread its legs and throw in some marjoram then tress the cavity.
• Loosely cover the bird with aluminum foil.
• Place in oven, consistently basting it with the liquid on the bottom (composed of water, vegetable scraps, and the juices from the hot, wet steamy bird).
• Baste approximately every thirty minutes for the recommended time: About 4 1/2 hours for a 16-20 pound bird at 325F or until internal turkey temperature is 185F During the last hour of baking, coat turkey with whisky or other liquor every 15 minutes.
• To make gravy: Take the bird out of the pan to cut.
• Skim off the gunk and take out the remains of the vegetable scraps.
• Put the pan over a burner on the stove and turn on medium heat.
• Make a sludge of a few spoons of flour and a little cold water, and mix into the hot pan liquids, stirring and scraping the pan.
• Throw in some scraps of meat and reduce liquid by 1/3.
• Have a drink of whiskey and enjoy!

Steps:

• For stuffing, in a medium saucepan cook celery, mushrooms, and onion in butter until tender but not brown, remove from heat.
• Stir in sage, pepper, and salt.
• Place dry bread cubes in a large mixing bowl, add onion mixture.
• Drizzle with enough broth or water to moisten, tossing lightly.
• Season body cavity of turkey with salt.
• Spoon some stuffing LOOSELY into the neck cavity.
• Pull the neck skin to the back, fasten with a skewer.
• LIGHTLY spoon more stuffing into the body cavity (place any remaining stuffing into a casserole, cover and chill. Dot with butter and bake alongside turkey for 35-45 minutes or until heated through).
• Tuck the ends of the drumsticks under the band of skin across the tail.
• If the band of skin is not present, tie the drumsticks securely to the tail.
• Twist wing tips under the back.
• Place turkey, breast side DOWN, on a rack in a shallow roastng pan.
• Brush with oil.
• Cover turkey loosely with foil.
• Roast turkey in a 325 degree oven for 3 1/4 to 3 1/2 hours, or until a meat thermometer placed into the center of a thigh (but not touching the bone) reads 180 degrees. Make sure center of stuffing reads 165 degrees.
• After about 1 1/2 hours, turn the turkey over so that it is breast side up.
• Brush breast side with oil.
• After 2 1/2 hours, cut loose drumsticks so that thighs will cook evenly.
• When done, drumsticks should move very easliy in their sockets and their thickest parts should feel soft when pressed.
• Uncover the last 30 minutes of roasting.
• To make dry bread cubes: cut bread into 1/2 inch squares.
• (12-14 slices of bread for 8 cups cubes) Place in a brown paper bag and close loosely.
• Let stand 3-4 days, mixing up by hand each day until thoroughly dry.
• OR, spread bread cubes onto a large cookie sheet in a single layer and bake at 300 degrees 10-15 minutes or until dry, stirring twice.
• Cool.
• I highly recommend using homemade white bread (by hand or bread machine) for the bread cubes.
• You will be AMAZED at the difference in texture!

Steps:

• Thaw the turkey and place in a roasting pan. Put 2 sticks of butter in the cavity of the turkey. Take 1/2 stick of butter and rub on the turkey itself. Pour 1/4 can of beer in the bottom of the roasting pan. Place desired amount of seasonings in the beer can (we love tons of flavor, so we use about 1 tablespoons each of garlic salt, cajun seasoning and greek seasoning and 1 teaspoons of onion salt. Place can into the cavity of turkey, top first. Leave the can sticking out of the cavity a couple of inches. Pat seasonings on the buttered turkey. Cover with aluminum foil. Cook as directed on bird.

Steps:

• Remove giblets and neck from turkey, and chill for gravy. Rinse turkey with cold water; pat dry with paper towels.
• Combine 1 teaspoons each mixed-up salt, garlic powder, poultry seasoning, sage, and pepper; sprinkle cavity and outside of turkey with mixture.
• Place turkey, breast side up, in a large roasting pan, tucking wingtips under. Pour 2 cans chicken broth into roasting pan; drizzle melted butter over turkey.
• Bake, uncovered at 450°F for 1 hour. reduce heat to 425°F, shield with aluminum foil to prevent excessive browning. Bake 3 1/2 to 4 hours or until a meat thermometer inserted in thigh registers 180F, basting every 45 minutes with pan drippings.
• Bring remaining 3 cans broth, neck, giblets, carrots, and next 3 ingredients to a boil in a saucepan. Cover, reduce heat, and simmer 45 minutes or until vegetables are tender.
• Remove turkey to a serving platter, reserving drippings in roasting pan. Skim excess fat from drippings in pan, if desired.
• Pour giblet mixture through a wire-mesh strainer into drippings in roasting pan, discarding solids. Bring to a boil in roasting pan over medium-high heat, stirring constantly to loosen browned bits on bottom of pan.
• Stir together flour and 1/2 cup water until smooth; add to giblet mixture, and over medium-high heat, stirring constantly, 10 minutes or until thickened. Stir in remaining 1/2 teaspoons each of mixed-up salt, garlic powder, and poultry seasoning. Serve with turkey. Garnish if desired.